Well it all started back about a week or two
I bought this instant Wonder glue

I'd seen it work on TV
And I just had to try me some

Well when I got home I spilled the stuff
And I reached for a towel to wipe it up
And that towel stuck to my hand like another thumb

And if that wasn't trouble enough
Here comes Rover chasing Fluff

And that cat jumped up and stuck right to my knee

Well, I reached down to hold the dog away
And I touched his ear and that's where my hand stayed

And he lit out a yelpin' draggin the cat and me

Well runnin through the house we knocked the bird cage down
And the parakeet got loose and was flyin' around

And it finally landed and it stuck to the top of my head

And I was tryin' to be careful But I just wasn't able
We were stickin to ashtrays and lamps and tables

And I was wishin I bought a roll of duct tape instead

Well I finally fell exhausted into a chair
And then you came in and found me there
With the bird on my head and my hand on the dog
And the cat stuck to my knee

And you said the scene looked heaven sent
That I looked like a man perfectly content
A regular Saint Frances of a sea scene
And before I could stop you
You laid a big kiss on me

Now Honey I'm stuck on you
Yes I'm stuck on you
I'm stuck to the dog and stuck to the cat
And stuck to the parakeet too

Ever since I bought that tube of instant Wonder glue
Everything has stuck on me and now I'm stuck on you

Well I got to thinkin sittin there that day
How do they make this stuff anyway
I mean there must be workers stuck all over the factory

I bet there's shoes on the floors

and shirts on the walls

And hats on the ceilings up and down the halls

Just gettin this stuff in the tubes
Has got to be a miracle to see

Now if we can ever make it to the telephone
And get the paramedics out to our home

Maybe they can surgically remove you
And the dog and the cat and the parakeet

And as soon as we're all healed up enough
We're gonna sneak in the plant where they make this stuff

And for revenge we'll put instant Wonder glue
on all of their toilet seats

Well I'm stuck on you
Yes I'm stuck on you
I'm stuck to the dog and stuck to the cat
And stuck to the parakeet too

Ever since I bought that tube of instant Wonder glue
Everything has stuck on me and now I'm stuck on you

I'm stuck on you
Yes I'm stuck on you
I'm stuck to the dog and stuck to the cat
And stuck to the parakeet too

Ever since I bought that tube of instant Wonder glue
Everything has stuck on me and now I'm stuck on you

4/8/06